Crawlspace

Unveiling the Depths
"Why a musical about a serial killer?" You might raise an eyebrow and think sensationalism and gore. But Crawlspace is none of that; it's a journey into the depths of the human mind- into the hidden secrets of American history and the darkest corners of our culture. It's a show that challenges conventions and makes you look beneath the surface.

 

The musical explores the heavy weight of abuse and how it looks different for each victim and survivor. It reminds us that some scars never fully heal.

 

Crawlspace also reflects on the true crime genre itself and its ethics. The musical is a cautionary tale about the dangers of dark obsessions and the risks of looking for answers where there may be none. Is it worth the risk for new understanding and breakthroughs? How far is too far? And what are the boundaries that should guide such pursuits?

 

At the same time, Crawlspace points to the dangers of relegating true crime stories to the shadows and not confronting their larger implications for society and human psychology. Many avoid true crime for fear of glorifying violent criminals. Can true crime be enlightening without elevating a criminal's infamy above the suffering of their victims? Crawlspace tackles such questions. As Leonard Bernstein once said: "A work of art does not answer questions, it provokes them; and its essential meaning is in the tension between the contradictory answers."

 

A Historical Mirror

This is a work of historical fiction set against a real American true crime story- the Gacy murders of the 70’s. The Gacy story is stranger than fiction and can be viewed as an allegory- a mirror held up to our culture’s darkest parts. We see only what we want to see. Fear, shame, and repression breed apathy. Crawlspace reimagines the case and confronts the uncomfortable truths head-on. It shifts the focus from “who” to “why” and creates a thought-provoking, immersive, and even cathartic experience for the audience.
 

The Victims

Crawlspace explores the dark legacies of abuse and violence, keeping victims clearly in focus. ​While Gacy's crimes and conviction make him a public figure, his victims did not choose such recognition. Therefore, in the script, the names and specific stories of Gacy's victims are altered. This decision serves to honor their privacy while still effectively conveying the tragedy, impact, and consequences of their deaths. It also prevents their identities from becoming overly associated with their convicted killer.

 

Gacy's victims were individuals with unique lives, dreams, and aspirations. They were more than mere numbers and deserve to be remembered beyond the circumstances of how they died. Crawlspace seeks to respectfully bring awareness and understanding to all victims of violence and abuse without exploitation or sensationalism.

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Humanizing the Complex

John was a showman, a man of extremes and cruelty. Crawlspace doesn’t glorify him or his actions. We show him as he was in life—a broken man with deep psychological problems. He’s not a monster but a deeply flawed and dangerous human—a much scarier, more timely, and thought-provoking concept. We explore his troubled childhood and repressed sexuality not to excuse his violence but to understand the complex web of events that led to his actions. This is a psychological thriller that explores evil, cycles of abuse, the criminal justice system, sexual stigmas, and mental health issues—issues that are still relevant today.

Mental Illness

In Crawlspace, John claims to suffer from Multiple Personality Disorder and, at times, blames the murders on an alternate personality—Jack Hanley. This aligns with the real-life case. Though the disorder has since been renamed Dissociative Identity Disorder, the show is set in the late 1970s and retains the terminology of the time.
 

In life, as in the show, John was a notoriously unreliable narrator with a known interest in psychology. At the time of his arrest, various psychology books were found in his home, including the infamous 1973 book Sybil by Flora Rheta Schreiber, which detailed the treatment of a patient with Multiple Personality Disorder. Years later, the book was revealed to be a fabricated account. Nonetheless, its publication led to a surge in diagnoses of the condition and widespread misunderstandings.
 

Many involved with the case believed that John, a known showman and conman, began forming his insanity defense long before his arrest. Multiple Personality Disorder was a topic of public fascination in the '60s and '70s (think Psycho) and was heavily sensationalized. Likewise, in the show, John’s concept of the disorder is also sensationalized, reflecting his manipulative tendencies and the cultural climate of the time—likely sensationalized.

It should be noted that John Wayne Gacy was never diagnosed with Multiple Personality Disorder. Instead, he was diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder and later with Paranoid Schizophrenia.
 

In the show, when John’s ghostly "multiples" appear on stage as part of his narrative, they can be interpreted in several ways—true fractures in his psyche, the personified voices of his conscience, the hallucinations often linked to Paranoid Schizophrenia, memories conjured by substance abuse, or a deliberate ruse to manipulate doctors and prosecutors. Here, "multiples" is not meant to imply "Multiple Personality Disorder" implicitly, but rather to personify Walt Whitman’s famous quote, “I contain multitudes,” from Song of Myself. It’s an attempt to visualize the human psyche—clinically fractured or not—and reflect a philosophical idea of human complexity.
 

Crawlspace examines John through the mental lens of the fictional Doctor Mathewson. What appears on stage is her interpretation of events as John describes them, filtered through her training and her evolving attempts to diagnose him. She must contend with John’s unreliability as a narrator while battling her own fears, past experiences, and biases, which occasionally interfere with her objectivity. Over the course of the play, John’s "ghosts" begin to mingle with her own, posing the question—were they ever simply John’s to begin with? The events depicted in Crawlspace are not intended to be a true representation of any particular mental disorder.

Instead, the play focuses on decoding mental issues to arrive at a diagnosis, factoring in unreadable patient narratives, misunderstandings of the time, sensationalism, and memory. Care has been taken not to portray any specific mental disorder inaccurately or contribute to stigma. This is a show about asking questions and exploring the complicated issues of humanity.
 

The waters are intentionally murky—nothing is black and white, but rather gray matter brought to life.
 

The Transformative Power of Music

Music has the unique ability to elevate words, convey emotion, and elegantly communicate even the most difficult stories. We believe it makes this tragic tale more accessible, transforming and humanizing the dark subject matter into an experience that transcends the sensationalism so often attached to it.

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The Mind's Journey

"We do not see things as they are; we see things as we are."
– Talmudic Saying
 

The story is told through the mind and filter of the fictional forensic psychologist, Dr. Judy Matthewson. The musical follows her as she remembers her interviews with John years after they took place. She tries to make sense of his crimes (and her past) and “re-lives” key moments, looking for a trigger that might cause violent behavior. She uses her professional training and personal experiences to process her thoughts.

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Blurring Realities

The Doctor enters a psychological realm where characters from John’s dark story intersect with her own memories and traumas. Everything on stage is either drawn from her experience or her interpretation of people and events as described by John, police reports, or other sources. So, nothing in this show is real. Every character and scenario is to be seen (and staged) as existing in the Doctor’s mind – a mind that becomes increasingly tangled with John’s as she tries to understand his behavior.
 

In the show, lines between reality, memory, and imagination become increasingly blurred. The musical can be interpreted metaphorically. The Doctor is a Dante-like figure who descends into the depths of a very personal hell, looking for answers, seeking purification, and maybe naively thinking she can explain the dark side of human nature. Dante journeyed through the abyss to reach an encounter with God on the other side – an answer to the mysteries. To the Doctor, God is science. Crawlspace owes a debt to Dante’s Inferno and Purgatorio.​

 

The Fragility of Memory

One of the major themes is the reliability of memory. Crawlspace illustrates through John and the Doctor how memory and imagination occupy the same space as ego, emotion, bias, want, pride, and ambition. Memory has many masters and can be remarkably flexible, especially when we search for meaning in the chaos of our lives.
 

Nietzche and Archetypal Forces

Friedrich Nietzsche’s work influenced the creation of Crawlspace- particularly through the Apollonian and Dionysian archetypes he introduced. These archetypes represent the opposing artistic and philosophical forces at the heart of the musical. The Apollonian represents order, reason, and clarity. The Dionysian is chaos, passion, and intoxication. These archetypes offer a way to look at the interplay of art and the characters in the show.

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In Crawlspace, the archetypes go beyond human nature. They are dynamic forces that shape the characters and the narrative itself. Using dialogue and introspection to explore each character's motivations is Apollonian. The dark and disturbing themes in the script (crime, violence, psychological horror) are Dionysian. The nonlinear and dreamlike sequences and the blurring of reality and hallucination are Dionysian disruptions of order and reason.

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John Wayne Gacy is primarily Dionysian but represents the darker aspects of human nature. He thrives in chaos and darkness- driven by inner demons and heinous acts. The Doctor is Apollonian, championing reason, order, and a scientific pursuit of understanding the human mind. Her pursuit of Gacy is rational and knowledge-seeking. But both characters change. The Doctor’s obsession with Gacy pulls her into the darkness and blurs the lines between the archetypes. Gacy, too, shows moments of vulnerability and introspection- Apollonian traits- if only fleeting.

Ultimately, Crawlspace explores the interplay between these archetypal forces as it delves into the characters' psyches and the broader themes of the story. It doesn't neatly categorize them into traditional Apollonian and Dionysian roles but uses these concepts to add depth to the characters' development and the narrative's exploration of human nature.​​

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Crawlspace offers a layered story with much to explore. If you have an open mind and enjoy being challenged by theater, we invite you to experience this thought-provoking musical that is not what you might expect. We encourage you to Look Beneath the Surface.
You'll be surprised by what you find.